One of the most irritating parts of the story to me is Job's friends. They started out with good intentions "for they had made an appointment together to come to mourn with him and to comfort him," (Job 2:11) but things went south very quickly. For seven days and nights that sat with Job and didn't say a word. Job's grief was so great they did not know how to comfort him. If only they'd stopped there...
Chapter after chapter Job's friends try to figure out what he has done to deserve this punishment on his life. He must have some great hidden sin. Surely bad things don't come to righteous people. His "friend" Eliphaz said in chapter 3, "Remember, I pray thee, who ever perished, being innocent? or where were the righteous cut off? Even as I have seen, they that plow iniquity, and sow wickedness, reap the same. By the blast of God they perish, and by the breath of his nostrils are they consumed."
I've said it before, but I will say it again. When you don't know what to say, say very little. When you see your friend hurting the best thing you can say is, "I'm praying for you." When someone loses a child, don't remind them of the others they still have. Children are not interchangeable. Job had 10 children and if nine had survived he would have still grieved the lost one. I really can't say, "I know what you're going through," because the "same" trial will not feel the same for any two people.
Job called his friends "miserable comforters." One of the definitions of the word "miserable" is extreme discomfort or unhappiness. Such a contradiction they were. I've been on the receiving end of those kinds of friends. I like to say "they tried" and "they mean well," when someone doesn't know what to say but they say something anyway. Think, long and hard if necessary, before you speak.
