Fultz's Funny Farm

How do I begin to describe the parade of animals that made its way through the Fultz household? Mom had this crazy habit of adopting stray animals. Dad never knew what new creature would be residing in our home when he came from work each day.

Here are a few examples of our more unusual residents:

Sam, the squirrel. This was a baby squirrel that fell out of a tree in our backyard. Mom nursed him and we all tried to tame him. Rod did the best in that arena. We probably had him for at least 10 years.

Handicat, the cat. Handicat, so named for his numerous handicaps, had 6 toes on each foot, was cross-eyed, could climb up trees but could never get down. We'd have to call him "Disabilitycat" now to be politically correct, but that was in the 70s. He also had a habit of getting in fights around the neighborhood and always losing.

Squeaky, the tortoise. When one of our elementary school teachers retired she no longer wanted her classroom pet - so, of course, he became ours. He was very patient, taking our Barbies for rides, but he did ruin my first attempt at a garden - he ate everyone of my bell peppers, tomatoes, and watermelons!

We also had hamsters, guinea pigs, rabbits, lizards, turtles, and frogs! Mom would "talk" to the guinea pigs, whistling just like them!

And then there were the dogs... Always dogs.... I can never remember a time growing up that we did not have a least one dog. Here are a few of the more memorable:

Bridget, the little brown chihuahua. She had 5 litters of puppies and each time she would present us with at least 4 puppies so each of us kids could have one of our own ... until it was time to give them away.

Cocoa, otherwise known at Loco. When the twins were very small they became terrified of dogs. Not afraid, terrified. Climbing-up-your-body-SCREAMING-when-a-dog-comes-toward-you type of terrified. Mom just couldn't stand not having a dog, so she got Cocoa. He was barely weaned and missing his family. The girls were still terrified. Mom finally "helped" them overcome their fears by telling them they were bigger than Cocoa. It eventually worked and they loved that dog for many, many years after Mom passed away.

Nellie, Cocoa's long lost twin. One day, after Mom had Cocoa for a few years, Nellie showed up at the door. She looked just like Cocoa, but was a totally different dog! Mom and the girls went around the neighborhood asking if she belonged to anyone. One little boy said, "I don't know where he lives, but I know his name is Cocoa." Well that settled it with Mom, Nellie became part of the family.

One dog, whose name now escapes me, was very special to me when I was about 4 years old. It was probably one of Bridget's puppies because we were giving it away. On the day that we were taking it to its new home, I was scheduled for pictures. I cried and cried about giving "my" puppy away. Pictures were going to be a disaster. Until I got to take them with my puppy!

Pepper. Oh boy, how to describe Pepper! Her greatest claim to fame was her obedience. Rod would sit on the couch and say, "Come here, Pepper" and she'd jump on the couch. He would then immediately say, "Get down" and she'd jump off. Rod would do this repeatedly, and each time up she'd go, then back down. Up, down, up, down. It was an endless game with Rod and why she put up with him is beyond me!

Penney, named for the pennies Mom and the twins saved to buy her. This was the last dog Mom bought and she so wanted a lap dog, one that would just sit and let her pet it. Of course Penney was too hyper for that, she also decided she liked Dad better than Mom. Penney now lives with Krysten and Lauren, spoiled as always.

Just as she did with children, Mom nourished and nurtured every animal that came her way. Dad was very patient, but every once in a while he put his foot down. One peaceful Saturday afternoon, we kids were playing at home, Dad was trying to relax, maybe even take a nap on the couch, when Mom came home:

Mom (rushing in the house): Bob, I need a box
Dad: Huh? A box? What for?
Mom: There's a little animal I need to rescue.
Dad: Where?
Mom: Around the corner.
Dad (knowing it is now useless to argue): I'll go with you, let me get my shoes on.
Mom: Well hurry!
Dad (when they get to the animal): It's a mole! We're not taking that thing home!

Such fun times at Fultz's Funny Farm!