Mary of Bethany ~ Woman of the Week

Mary of Bethany is written about in all four of the gospels.  I find it interesting that only John records any words by her.  We may not have many words by Mary, but her actions speak clearly.  I will be quoting from many commentaries - they were all very insightful!

Verses:  Matthew 26:6-13, Mark 14:1-9, Luke 10:38-42, John 11:1-45, John 12:1-8
In the chronological Bible these verses appear in this order:  Luke 10:38-42, John 11:1-45.  Matthew 26:6-13, Mark 14:1-9, and  John 12:1-8 contain the same story.

 

Background – parents, husband, children, siblings

We don't know anything about Mary's parents.  We know she had one sister, Martha, and one brother, Lazarus.  As far as we know, she was not married, at least at the time of the writings of the gospels.

 

What is she most known for? Victories? Defeats? How can I be like her? How can I avoid being like her?

We first read about Mary while Jesus is in their home, there she "sat at Jesus' feet, and heard his word." (Luke 11:39)  "She sat to hear, which denotes a close attention. Her mind was composed, and she resolved to abide by it: not to catch a word now and then, but to receive all that Christ delivered."(Matthew Henry’s Commentary on the Whole Bible)  "Mary heard him with great eagerness and diligence, affection, pleasure, and profit." (John Gill's Exposition of the Entire Bible)

 

Mary does not try to defend herself when Martha complains to Jesus.  She keeps quiet while Jesus points out that Martha was troubled about many things.  "Mary hath chosen that good part, which shall not be taken away from her."  "Serious godliness is a needful thing, it is the one thing needful; for nothing without this will do us any real good in this world, and nothing but this will go with us into another world." (Matthew Henry)  "There are times when it is proper to suspend worldly employments, and to attend to the affairs of the soul. It was proper for Mary to do it. It would have been proper for Martha to have done it. It is proper for all on the Sabbath and at other occasional seasons - seasons of prayer and for searching the word of God - to suspend worldly concerns and to attend to religion.  If attention to religion be omitted at the proper time, it will always be omitted. If Mary had neglected to hear Jesus then, she might never have heard him."  (Albert Barnes' Notes on the Bible)

A Commentary on the Old and New Testaments by Robert Jamieson, A. R. Fausset and David Brown said this, "Martha’s choice would be taken from her, for her services would die with her; Mary’s never, being spiritual and eternal. Both were true-hearted disciples, but the one was absorbed in the higher, the other in the lower of two ways of honoring their common Lord. Yet neither despised, or would willingly neglect, the others' occupation. The one represents the contemplative, the other the active style of the Christian character. A Church full of Marys would perhaps be as great an evil as a Church full of Marthas. Both are needed, each to be the complement of the other."

 

We next read about Mary in John chapter 11 when Lazarus dies.  John tells us that Jesus loved Mary just as He loved Martha and Lazarus.  They were important to Him.  This is another time when we see the differences in Mary and Martha.  While Martha went out to meet Jesus as soon as she heard He was coming, "Mary sat still in the house."  I had never consider Mary staying in the house as a negative or a positive, but Matthew Henry had some interesting things to say about that:

"When Martha went to meet Jesus, Mary sat still in the house. Some think she did not hear the tidings, being in her drawing-room, receiving visits of condolence, while Martha who was busied in the household-affairs had early notice of it. Perhaps Martha would not tell her sister that Christ was coming, being ambitious of the honor of receiving him first. Holy prudence conducts us to Christ, while brethren and parents know not what we are doing.  Others think she did hear that Christ was come, but was so overwhelmed with sorrow that she did not care to stir, choosing rather to indulge her sorrow, and to sit poring upon her affliction, and saying, I do well to mourn. Comparing this story with that in Luke 10:38, we may observe the different tempers of these two sisters, and the temptations and advantages of each. Martha's natural temper was active and busy; she loved to be here and there, and at the end of every thing; and this had been a snare to her when by it she was not only careful and cumbered about many things, but hindered from the exercises of devotion: but now in a day of affliction this active temper did her a kindness, kept the grief from her heart, and made her forward to meet Christ, and so she received comfort from him the sooner. On the other hand, Mary's natural temper was contemplative and reserved. This had been formerly an advantage to her, when it placed her Christ's feet, to hear his word, and enabled her there to attend upon him without those distractions with which Martha was cumbered; but now in the day of affliction that same temper proved a snare to her, made her less able to grapple with her grief, and disposed her to melancholy: But Mary sat still in the house. See here how much it will be our wisdom carefully to watch against the temptations, and improve the advantages, of our natural temper."

After Martha's conversation with Jesus she "called Mary her sister secretly, saying, The Master is come, and calleth for thee."  Mary doesn't remain in the house, but "she arose quickly, and came unto him."  "Having an equal affection for him as her sister Martha; and which she showed, by leaving her comforters at once, and by making the haste she did, to another and better comforter: both Martha and Mary, out of their great love to Christ, break through the rule for mourners of not going out of the door of the house the first week of mourning." (John Gill)  "Affection for her Lord, assurance of His sympathy, and His hope of interposition, putting a spring into her distressed spirit." (JFB)

 

Mary met Jesus with the same words that Martha had, "Lord, if thou hadst been here, my brother had not died." Those are the only recorded words of Mary.  Once again, her actions speak, "she fell down at his feet."  "She fell down not as a sinking mourner, but fell down at his feet as a humble petitioner. This Mary had sat at Christ's feet to hear his word (Luke 10:39), and here we find her there on another errand."  (Matthew Henry) 

Did she reach a place when she needed to reset?  If so, did she?  For good or evil?

In light of the previous commentary, I think it is extraordinary what Mary did when she anointed Jesus' feet with oil.  She, who had previously sat quietly at His feet, who seemed to speak very little, stepped out of her comfort zone to show her love for Him.  "This act of faith and love was so remarkable, that it would be reported, as a memorial of Mary's faith and love, to all future ages, and in all places where the gospel should be preached.  This was an extraordinary piece of respect paid him by a good woman that thought nothing too good to bestow upon Christ, and to do him honor.  She had a pound of ointment of spikenard, very costly, which probably she had by her for her own use; but the death and resurrection of her brother had quite weaned her from the use of all such things, and with this she anointed the feet of Jesus, and, as a further token of her reverence for him and negligence of herself, she wiped them with her hair, and this was taken notice of by all that were present, for the house was filled with the odor of the ointment." (Matthew Henry)

"The woman who anointed Him was not informed of the circumstances about to happen, nor was she a prophetess. But the approach of that hour of darkness was felt by one whose heart was fixed on Jesus." (Synopsis of the Old and New Testaments by John Nelson Darby) "Mary shows us the worship of a grateful heart.  Mary of Bethany, who alone of our Lord's disciples had comprehended His thrice repeated announcement of His coming death and resurrection, invested the anointing with the deeper meaning of the preparation of His body for burying. " (Scofield Reference Notes)

 

The stories of Mary and Martha are so encouraging to me.  They are very different sisters, but Jesus loved them both.  They showed their love in very different ways, but still Jesus loved them both.  I think we need to be like both of them - we need to be willing to serve and willing to sit.  We need to be bold in proclaiming our faith - in both words (Martha) and actions (Mary.)  As one commentary said, "Both are needed, each to be the complement of the other," this can be true in each of us.  I'm not saying it will be easy, but I think it's something we should strive for.  Whatever our natural temperament, we can work on those things that will draw us closer to Him and able to serve Him more.